It's a Boy!!! My Birth Story...

My baby boy was born on Saturday, January 16th at 8am and weighed in at 8 lbs, 5 oz and was 21.5 inches long!

First off, I am still undecided on how much to include in the blog in terms of baby details, so at the moment I am not going to include the baby's name. I know I am being paranoid, but I'm also pretty sure that almost all of my readers are friends of mine on facebook and already know some of the details.

I hope you understand and it won't take away from the birth story itself. So... here we go...

On Friday morning around 11:30 am I had a killer back ache that lasted a couple minutes. Because of the location of the backache it didn't even occur to me that this was my very first contraction. It felt just like low back pain which I've had a bit of lately anyhow. I took a shower and went to meet my Mom and sister for lunch. By the time I got home at 2pm I knew that the low back pain "spasms" that were about twenty minutes apart were actually back labor. I also knew from talking to my doula, that back labor happens when the baby isn't turned the correct way and it's spine is rubbing along your spine. The home "remedy" for this is doing a lot of hip movements while on all fours in an effort to turn the baby. Very attractive, let me tell you. At 3:30 or so I called my husband telling him that he should probably cancel his four o'clock appointment and come home around that time because I was in early labor. I also had the crazy idea to try and take a nap to gear up for the marathon of birthing.

And this is when it got crazy folks. About an hour after calling him my contractions (still in my back and not at all in my abdomen--not at all what I was expecting labor to feel like...) were about five minutes apart. That's when they tell you to head to the hospital!! Talk about zero to 60. I had planned on staying at home as long as possible, so I called my doula to inform her of the quick progression. She hit the road immediately to get down to my house. Of course, she was in Chesterfield and we are downtown and it's now the beginning of the Highway 4o rush hour.... and there was a big accident. She kept in contact with us, but during her drive down to our house my contractions got to be three minutes apart. From the sound of my voice/breathing, she knew I had better hit the road and get to the hospital because we were going to be dealing with rush hour traffic on our end as well. I rode in the back seat and was cussing up a storm when a contraction would come on. It was just so surreal how in between contractions you feel almost normal. In the car I was watching the clock and dreading for my three minutes of "off time" were up signaling another contraction.

So we got to the hospital at about 5:45, met the doula, got admitted, etc. At about 6 they did my first dilation check. I was at four centimeters. If they told me I was at 2 or something I would have probably freaked out, but my goal was between 5 and 6 centimeters without an epidural, so knowing I was at 4 gave me some hope. I could definitely handle another hour or so. I felt way more comfortable on the birthing ball, so that is where I labored for that hour. At 7pm I was at 6 centimeters and they called for the epidural. I guess I actually got it around 7:30.

** I should note that my goal of between five and six centimeters was a decision I made with my doula based on her experience. While most of the births she assists with are epidural free, she knew that wasn't something that I wanted. I had hoped to get to a point where the birth had enough momentum to keep it going without a lot of intervention in the form of pitocin, etc. **

Keep in mind-- I got to 6 centimeters without any abdomen pain. So strange and not at all what I was expecting. The back labor was very intense and definitely the worst pain I have ever experienced. Of course, I've never had any broken bones or surgery or anything, so I guess I don't have much to compare it to. But to be in full blown labor and not have any abdomen or groin pain at all?! Craziness.

So at 7:30 the anesthesiologist came in and administered the epidural. I've heard horror stories of this procedure as well. While it was excruciating having a contraction and having to remain completely still at the same time, the procedure itself didn't bother me at all.

At this point based on the progression of labor, my nurse was convinced that I would be pushing this baby out by 2am. When given that time estimate, I had a fleeting thought of "maybe I could have done it med free." I am sort of goal oriented and when the nurse mentioned a specific time, I had a little bit of regret about the epidural. That in itself is strange since I had never even really seriously considered going med free. Like I said, it was a fleeting thought, and as I wrap up this birth story you will see that in the end I knew I made the right call (for me personally) on the epidural.

By 11pm I was at 8 centimeters. Things seemed to be moving right along. Even though I couldn't feel much pain at this point, I was well aware that the baby was still not facing the right direction. During the entire birthing process I didn't spend one minute lying on my back. (Except for the pushing stage) After coming off the birthing ball and getting the pain meds, I was positioned on my side. The nurses and my doula would periodically roll me from one side to the other in the hopes of getting the baby to turn in the right direction. Oh-- an interesting note about epidurals. I guess the medicine travels through the body with gravity, so after lying on my right side for about 20 minutes or so the medicine would travel down to the lowest point-- the right side-- leaving my left side open to feeling the pain. Then I would get rolled to the opposite side, wait about 10 minutes for things to equalize and then 20 minutes after that my right side would start feeling the contractions. It wasn't exactly as pain free as I had hoped, but certainly better than nothing.

Being at 8 cm at 11pm, I was very excited and geared up for my next progress check at 1 am. That is, until I actually got it. Two hours later and I was still at 8 cm. It appeared that the nurse's estimate of a 2am birth just flew out the window. The baby still had not turned as much as it needed to and was wedged against a pelvis bone. At this point they decided that I needed some pitocin. I had pretty much sworn it off, but we made the decision that something had to be done to get this baby to turn. If I wasn't already at 8 cm I would have probably refused it, but after talking to my doula we just decided that something had to change.

Although I can't remember the specific milliliters, I ended up only needing a small amount to ramp up the contractions. After that it was just several hours more of being rolled from side to side and waiting. Around 3 am I started to have a mental breakdown. It wasn't about pain, but more about my mental state. I guess I had that 2 am thing in my mind and really had just had enough of all of it. I was exhausted mentally and wanted to see this baby!!

Fast forward to 6am. A light at the end of the tunnel! The baby had turned and was continuing on it's path. At 7 am I started pushing. I pushed for a full hour (although I was so excited it really only felt like 10 minutes or so.) At eight o'clock on the dot my baby boy came into the world!

I had asked for the doctor to show the sex to my husband so I could hear the gender from him rather than from the doctor, but I beat them all to the punch when I looked down and announced, ?"Oh my god, it's a boy!!"

The cord was wrapped around his neck so my husband was not able to do the whole cord cutting thing, nor were we able to donate the cord blood as we had planned. It wasn't wrapped too tightly, so there wasn't any real risk to the baby, but it was still enough to freak a brand new mother out! The baby was immediately deposited on my chest as the doctor did all of the necessary "repairs." In the end I wound up with a second degree tear. Not something to scoff at, but really not that bad either considering the size of the baby.

I held my new baby boy for a while before they took him off to the side to clean him up a bit. A few minutes later then returned him to me and we tried out breast feeding. The first go round didn't go that well. He was more interested in staring at me than in eating, which was fine with me. We tried again successfully a half an hour later and I swear that boy has been eating ever since!

So there you have it. My birth story. All in all, things went pretty much to plan but just took way longer than I expected. If/when we decide to have another baby I will probably hope to stick to my plan of getting at least half way dilated before getting an epidural. It just seemed like the right decision for me and worked out well in the end.

We couldn't be more thrilled with our new baby boy and are having an awesome time having him home and getting to know him. Life has most definitely changed for the better. I can't wait to keep you all updated on what else has been going on the last couple of weeks and what is coming up with us in the future. My next blog will be about the roller coaster of a hormonal shift during the first week and a half or so after having this little bundle of joy. I swear, I have never been on such a wild emotional ride as that first week home. The joys of motherhood!!!

Yep... Still Pregnant.

Well, that whole due date thing turned out to be a little anti-climatic. I am most definitely still pregnant. I did have my weekly doctors appointment yesterday. I'm going to use some pregnancy/delivery related terms in the next paragraph, so you can just skip ahead if you don't care...

Everything looked great at the doctor's appointment. Perfect blood pressure, perfect heart rate for the baby. As of last week's appointment I was 50% effaced and had no dilation. As of yesterday I was 100% effaced and 1 cm dilated. Hey, at least I'm making some progress! After the general checking of things my doctor wanted to talk induction, which of course freaked me out. I told her that I want to go into labor naturally and if we were going to be discussing induction, then I wanted to talk about it in terms of how long she would let me go assuming the baby is still happy and healthy in there. She decided to send me to the hospital for a non-stress test so that they could make sure the baby was cooking along in there and that there was plenty of fluid for it to swim around in.

So off I went to the hospital. What's is funny is that I have never had a non-stress test and didn't really know what they were looking for. I got hooked up to the fetal heart rate monitor and just sat there for like a half an hour. The nurse came back in to check on me and basically told me that the test didn't officially start until the baby was active. (i.e. not snoozing away in there.) Of course, I know my baby's general post-breakfast busy time was over and it was napping. I could have told them that from the beginning if I had known what they were looking for. Luckily, they brought me some juice and the baby perked right up. I was also having a series of regular contractions at that point which I could see on the little print out. Of course I got overly excited and thought I was going into labor right then and there. The nurse then burst my bubble and told me that it's pretty typical to have regular contractions after an internal at the doctor's office. Darn it. Sure enough, after a couple of hours they faded into oblivion.

I then went in for the ultrasound to check the fluid levels. Now keep in mind that I haven't had an ultrasound since the 20 week mark, so it was very cool to see how much had changed in there. After it was all said and done they told me that there was plenty of fluid and the baby looked perfect.

So... After the good report at the hospital the doctor agreed to schedule a routine visit for next Tuesday, but if I still have not had the baby then we were going to have to discuss the induction. I'm just hoping that I don't even make it to the Tuesday appointment. I feel like if I'm effaced and a little dilated them my body if obviously preparing for what it needs to do at this point.

So that it where I stand physically. Mentally it has been a little more of a roller coaster. You have that due date in your mind for so long that when it is approaching you get all kinds of nervous and excited. Last week I had a ton of stuff on the calendar to keep me busy. This week I had almost nothing in the hopes that I would be home and taking care of a baby. On Tuesday I had literally nothing going on. I went to the gym, finished a book that I was reading and just sat around. Not a good idea. Lots of people were calling to "check in." They meant well, but it was totally getting on my nerves. After sort of a depressing day Tuesday, I filled up my day for yesterday. Gym, then breakfast with a friend, the doctor, lunch with my Mom and an afternoon movie. It was a much better way to keep my mind off of things. I think I might make a trip to the mall today.

So... that's the update for now. No obvious impending labor signs at this point today. Hopefully something changes soon!

2 Days from the Supposed "D Day." - Some Thoughts and Observations.

Obviously, very few babies are due on their due date. Fewer than 10%, in fact. However, since the 13th is the date I've had in my mind and been working toward, we'll just pretend that I really am that close to having this baby. There is a ton of randomness going through my mind at this point, so I thought I had better get it down...

• This baby had definitely "dropped." You can't tell by just looking at my waistline, but according to the doctors the baby has moved very very low into the pelvis. I have a freakishly short torso, so it's not that easy to tell visually, but I didn't really need the doctor to tell me that. Like most pregnant women, I've been peeing like crazy all throughout the pregnancy but in the last week or so my bathrooms trips have gone something like this... Go to the toilet with the incredible urge to pee... pee about two tablespoons...get up... flush... wash hands... get the incredible urge to pee again. Sorry if that's tmi, but it's getting ridiculous.

• Nesting. I can't really tell if I've gotten the nesting impulse. Mostly because I think I always have the nesting impulse. I'm a neat freak and always making lists of things to do, clean, etc. My husband thinks I've got it though based on the basement. Maybe it has been the absurdly cold weather, but I got it in my head that I need to stock up on just about everything so I don't have to go out and leave the house for a while. Toilet paper, food, toiletries, etc. The basement now looks like we are ready to either open a Target or are prepared for a nuclear war. I swear we have enough toilet paper to last us until July.

• I finally packed my hospital bag. I think you are supposed to be prepared and have this done like a month before the due date, but I just did it last week. I've been convinced throughout the whole pregnancy that this baby is going to be late, so maybe that is why I postponed.

•I am finally "ready to go." You know how you hear pregnant women say that they are just ready to get this baby out of there and move on? Well, I didn't really reach that point until Friday. I don't know what it was. I think we were getting ready to go out to dinner with friends. I was sick of my maternity clothing selection, and just feeling overly large in general. I finally got that feeling that I am ready to have this baby. I thought it was pretty good that it took until 39.5 weeks to get to that stage. And maybe it's a good thing that the baby didn't come early. up until Friday I might have been really sad to have the pregnancy over and done with. Funny how the body/mind works.

• I am now a master baby equipment assembler. My husband gets mad at me because he is totally willing to help, but by the time he gets home from work whatever the project of the day was is done. Strollers, swings, pack-n-plays, car seats, bassinets. You name it, I've assembled/installed it. I don't think I even need the instruction manuals any more.

• Dreams. Good lord. As if the nighttime trips to the bathroom and uncomfortable side-lying sleeping position weren't enough to keep me up at night, the last couple of weeks my dreams have been INSANE. They aren't baby related dreams either. They are like vivid, weirdo acid tripping dreams. (Not that I would really know, but I can imagine.) That new Avatar 3-d movie has nothing on what I have going on in my head.

• I am currently weighing in at 142 pounds. I actually haven't gained anything in the last couple of weeks, which is pretty common for the end of pregnancy. I just think the 142 number is funny because I started out at 112 and the doctor told me to gain about 30 pounds. I guess I really followed the doctor's orders on that one! I have been blessed to avoid that dreaded stretch marks but am sporting quite the linea nigra.

• And finally some semi funny irrational fears... You'd think I'd be concerned about delivery, pain, recovery, etc since I'm so close to meeting this little one. Of course I have some fear of the unknown, but when it comes to that stuff, I'm more of a "take it as it comes" person. Instead... ridiculous things like these are scaring me...

- Somehow, in my sleep I am going to toss a pillow into the bassinet and suffocate the baby.

- I am not going to know how to say no to the family and pretty soon I'm going to have my mother and mother-in-law over at the house 24/7. (This one might have some truth behind it...)

-I am going to have a 12 pound baby.

-My baby will be born with the enlarged genitals they tell you about in birthing class. It's fairly common and goes away in a few days but of all the post birth issues that babies can have that one (and the accompanying photos) freaked me out!!

I'm sure there is more, but I will leave it at that for now. Hopefully in the next couple of days our little family of two will become a family of three. I am just so excited I can barely stand it!!!!!!

Some Thoughts on the Blog and Nursery Photos...

Well, I have neither fallen off the face of the earth nor had this baby yet, so basically I have no excuse for not keeping you guys up to date. The last month or so I have just been undecided on what to do about the blog. My lack of posts isn't due to lack of exciting things to write about or even the lack of time to do it in. Really, in my spare time (which is/was at a minimum with getting ready for the baby and the madness that was the holidays) I have been contemplating how much "personal" information I put on the blog. There are people out there that include far more than I do about their personal information but for some reason (maybe it's just some sort of protective motherly impulse kicking in) I have been hesitant lately.

I will say that there has been nothing to make me particularly worried. No weird comment posts or followers or anything like that. Just my own paranoia. I think my options at this point are...

-Ignore the paranoia and continue as usual.

-Password protect the blog so I can continue posting baby/bump/name photos and feel comfortable doing so. (Is that just annoying-- would you readers still want to read if I had a password on it? I don't even know how that works. Would you have to put the password in each and every time? That seems like a PIA.)

-Or continue with an "open" blog but just not put as much baby info. (I guess I just want to avoid strangers knowing my baby's face, name, etc.)

What are your thoughts? Have you guys ever had similar reservations with your blogs?

Anyways. On to more pleasant things like NURSERY PHOTOS!! The nursery has pretty much been done for quite some time now. My priorities for the nursery were...

-Gender neutral

-Nothing too crazy and babyish as we probably won't live in this house for all that long. I would hate to have to "undecorate" to make the house sellable or rentable if we choose to keep it as an investment property.

-Cozy and comfortable

-A little more for me than for baby. Perhaps a little selfish, but I'm going to be the one looking at this stuff at all hours of the night! :)

So without further adieu... Here are the pics! Ooh-- and can you tell I used my new camera to take them?

And a couple of detail shots... Here is the book shelf with my decorated baskets on them...

And isn't he cute? My mother in law had him made from my husband's grandmother's old mink coat. (I added the giraffe ribbon to tie him in.)

And I painted this little table myself. Perfect for next to the rocker.

So what do you think? I think the only missing piece is something to put above the crib, but I will be waiting until after the baby comes to do that. (It will probably be something that will incorporate the name...)